Do you ever feel as though your hormones get in the way of being the most effective leader ?
Or maybe you find yourself being more harsh during certain times of the month?
If you are like most women leaders you are probably tough on yourself and you probably have some shame around all this or even feel like you should just hide during certain days in your cycle. You don’t want to hurt anyone but you sort of know your feelings are real and honest, and people around you just take you the wrong way. Is this you? Someone you know? I invite you to keep reading; I think this will help. And you may want to share with your powerhouse girlfriends.
First of all you are not alone. Did I already say that. Well, it merits me repeating.
I have coached and consulted for women leaders who are creative, powerful, and who confess to me that they do not know what to do with their emotions at times. They value their sensitivity, but sometimes they fight their emotions, and no matter what, the frustration comes out in their words. They are at times misperceived even though they have a big heart. I am talking women who run $1M-20M companies.
No shame, my dear.
Ok, so now that we have forgiven ourselves for our less controlled monthly moments, can we get some solutions in place? I get it. It’s not enough to accept ourselves, but then keep repeating the patterns that are clearly NOT working for all those who rely on us to lead or manage them. And most of us do not want to come across as a hot mess to the people who look to us as a role model. So, what is a Business Priestess to do?
Here are my must-implement-like-today tips. Warning: the tips alone are awesome, but if you find yourself next month struggling, reach out to me. I am taking on a new big project, but have room for ONE coaching client. 😉
Business Priestess Leadership Tip Time…
1. I want you to print out a calendar for one month: go here to download one: https://www.timeanddate.com/calendar/. I suggest you put it by your bedside table and at the end of the day (for the entire month) you gage your emotional wellbeing for that day. Keep it simple + rate it as: a. rock star day b. neutral c. struggled d. hot mess day
2. Do this for one month (even better if you do 3 months) and notice the patterns. Notice how it aligns with your cycle. Knowing your baseline is key to helping you and your team thrive.
3. Once you know your (c) struggled and your (d) hot mess days guard them as if they were new born babies. Meaning that once you know that around day 20 of your cycle you start struggling those are the days to reduce activities (travel less, schedule less, book a massage).
If some months it feels as though you have little control of going into your woman cave, no worries, having the information can be the prompt to expect less of yourself. Yes, you read that correctly. Expect less. Order in, get set up for a nice epsom or sea salt bath, or journal your frustration away.
4. Educate those closest to you on the days when you need more support, love and understanding. You are not meant to struggle alone, you are meant to be SUPPORTED. So, tell your spouse, boyfriend/ girlfriend, kids, roommates. The code word we have in our home is “I am tender today”. And when someone is not realizing it for themselves we say “oh, you are feeling tender today”. It’s compassionate, honoring, and to the point.
5. Advocate for what you REALLY need. You do not have to force yourself to be something you are not. You do not have to tell people why you need your woman cave. No permission is needed from anyone. Own your Queendom and do this for you. Because when we put on our oxygen mask on ourselves first, we are better equipped to help others, and we are just way more productive and effective.
Note: when you are in those tender days, I want you to remember that you are a fricken ORACLE. There is truth in what you feel, sense, and think. Yes, there is. Don’t let any conditioning say that you are crazy, hormonal, or whatever other demeaning thing we hear as women. You are truth incarnate. The trick is what to do with this truth that pours through your veins once (or twice) a month. This is where you may need help managing and implementing the right tools to help you be a powerful leader and taking care of yourself.
Believe me I have experience for myself and all the women I have supported through the years.
The biggest mistake I have seen powerful leaders make is minimize their struggle and plough through month after month. This usually blows up in their face at some point, and causes teams to lose trust in their leader, and eventually break apart something that would otherwise be a harmonious tribe. I don’t’ want that for you. I want you to feel good about where you are, know yourself in and out, have the right tools in place to support you & your profitable ventures, and be the leader you know you are!
We got this! If you want to hear more about the most effective tools, schedule time with me.
p.s. if this was helpful, share with a girlfriend who could use these tips! I will surely appreciat you spreading the word. Not just for my benefit, ,but for the benefit of all misunderstood women leaders.